Ask the Demons
by Tigertyler7
Summary: The demons of Tartaros all are forced to answer questions and they can be anything even ridiculous ones. this is after the Tartaros arc and some demons are revived for the event while others were forced to come. new questions are acceptable.
1. Chapter 1

Ask the demons

"Welcome to "Ask the Demons", I am Tiger and today I have the 4 surviving members of tartarus Torafuzar, Lamy, Seilah, and Franmalth, along with the 6 revived only for the event demons Tempester, Ezel, Keyes, Silver, Mard Gear, Kyôka, and Jackal."

"This is certainly an interesting development." Kyôka said

"Kyôka, Tempester, Ezel, Keys, Jackal, Mard Gear? I thought you all were dead!" Seilah said."

"HEY!" Silver said.

"No one really cares about traitors Silver" Seilah said.

"Here is how it goes, I ask a question that either the viewers or I have and you have to answer them, if you don't well… let's just say that you would rather be dead." Tiger said.

"And what if just use our curses to kill you first?" Ezel asked.

"I control reality and I have friends who control Time, Space, and Life." Tiger said.

"I think I will shut up now" Ezel said.

"Now we begin." Tiger said. "Our first question is for Jackal"

"Nuts." Jackal said.

"Do you eat gun powder to power up your Explosion curse?"

"Whats it to you if I answer?" Jackal said. A bomb proof hammer squashed Jackal while the others cringed minus Keyes.

"JACKAL NO!" Lamy said.

"I think I'll answer now" Jackal said and the hammer lifted off of him. " I eat a little bit with my cupcakes." Jackal admitted.

Everyone minus Keyes snickers a little.

"What is wrong with me eating cupcakes?!" Jackal asked.

"Nothing it is just hard to imagine you with a cupcake." Seilah answered.

"Tch Whatever." Jackal said.

"Next question is for Lamy. Is your room full of Jackal plushies like Juvia's is full of Gray plushies?" Tiger asked while showing a projection of Juvia's room.

"I suddenly pity the boy now." Kyôka said.

"Yes, my room is filled with Jackal plushies." Lamy answered.

"I suddenly don't feel very safe." Jackal said while moving away from Lamy

"I have some tea and refreshments if you want them and a cupcake for Jackal." Tiger said while everyone took some tea/water and grabbed a pastry while Jackal blushed while taking the cupcake.

"Next question is for Ezel. what was going through your mind when a 12 year old girl who prefers to stay away from fights and rather heals and enchants defeated you." Tiger said

Seilah and Kyôka spit out their tea in surprise while Mard Gear choked on a pastry a little while Jackal and Franmalth were laughing and Torafuzar just muttered "So much for demon pride." Keyes and Tempester just stayed emotionless. Ezel had a blush the same shade as his tattoos.

"I wouldn't answer if you didn't have a piano hanging above me so, I was very embarrassed and angry that it happened like the way it did. I just want to know how wind cut through my blade." Ezel answered.

"Air and water if they have the right pressure can cut through anything." Tiger said. "Next question is for Torafuzar, how do you think of humans now that you have a taste of their power?" Tiger asked.

"I feel more respect for them. I honorably say that their emotions aren't as foolish as I thought." Torafuzar admitted.

"Interesting, alright next question is for Silver. How do you feel about Gray's striping habit?" Tiger asked.

"Can he also give Jackal that habit?" Lamy asked with a nosebleed.

"As long as he dosen't go too far in places he shouldn't I will be fine with it." Silver said

"I wonder how much his striping habit costs him, how much it costs him." Franmalth said.

"Next is Tempester, Why did you change your look?" Tiger asked.

"It wasn't my choice." Tempester said.

"It was mine actually." Lamy said.

"Here is a random question for Franmalth, your on your canoe and a tire falls out, how many pancakes will it take to re shingle your roof. furthermore how much will it cost.

"Lets see carry the 2 and multiply the dimensions of the roof… 322 pancakes and the cost would be… multiply 322 with the jewels for the pancake… 1250 jewels, in terms of souls that would be 30 to a demon anyway." Franmalth said.

"Quick, where can we get that much pancake batter at anyways?" Tiger asked. Tempester whistles suspiciously and everyone looks at him.

"What, the only thing I remember whenever I use a life is the fact that I love pancakes. Tempester said.

"… moving on uh next is Keyes, if you have the power to control the dead, doesn't that mean you can revive all the demons that died while you were facing Farytail?" Tiger asked.

"It doesn't work that way." Keyes said.

"Mard Gear, were you surprised by your defeat?" Tiger asked

"We all were." Mard Gear said

"Alright then. Seilah, Rumor has it that you are writing a book, is this true?"

"Yes, I am writing my own story because all the other stories are pretty much about humans, I want one where the character is one of us." Seilah said.

Good luck with that and finally, Kyôka are you a lesbian for Seilah or Erza?

"WHAT?!" Everyone said.

"It turns out those stories are uh… popular amongst readers."

"Maybe I am, Maybe I am not." Kyôka answered getting a nosebleed from Jackal, Silver, and Ezel.

Now for a group question; Do you even know why you were created?

"I don't even know" all of them answered.

"Zeref created you to kill him. If you don't believe me here is a recording of him saying it." Tiger said.

"I can't believe he would do something like that" Torafuzar said with a scowl. everyone agreed.

"See you next time.

 **Tiger here announcing that if you have a question for the demons type your question and your username and if I like it I will use it. I don't on Fairytail, Hiro Mashima does.**


	2. Chapter 2

Ask the demons

"What is up? time for day 2 of Ask the demons." Tiger said. Everyone else groaned.

"WHAT WAS THAT?!" Tiger said holding a boulder over his head.

"YAY!" Everyone instantly said.

"Good, my first question is for silver. If E.N.D. is a flame demon wouldn't water work better than ice?" Tiger asked.

"Yes, Now why didn't I think of that? But I am happy knowing that I passed it on to gray for he is an ice wizard." Silver answered.

"Next is for Jackal from TokyoTeddyWolf. How did you survive the explosion when happy flew you into the air?" Tiger asked.

"Back then we still had "Hell's Core" and I was brought back to life there." Jackal explained.

"Hey, there is a back to this and it is written out in… blood?!" Tiger said.

"This can't be good." Jackal thought

" CAN SOMEONE BEAT HIM WITH A FRYING PAN FOR TRYING TO HURT LUCY WHILE SHE WAS CRYING OVER AQUARIUS' BROKEN KEY?! DAMMIT JACKAL LET A WOMAN MOURN HER FRIEND FOR TEN ******* MINUTES AT LEAST WILL YA?! OR I SWEAR TO MAVIS I WILL RIP A HOLE IN REALITY, CLIMB INTO YOUR WORLD, SET YOU ON FIRE AND REPEATEDLY PLAY JUSTIN BEIBER IN YOUR EARS WHILE SLICING YOU OPEN OVER AND OVER AGAIN WHILE THE FLAMES CAUTERIZE YOUR WOUNDS SO I CAN SLICE THEM OPEN AGAIN! AND THEN YOU SHALL BE NEUTERED LIKE THE BAD DOG YOU ARE! BESIDES YOU GOT YOUR ASS KICKED ANYWAY BY THE ONLY CELESTIAL MAGE IN FAIRY TAIL! NEVER UNDERESTIMATE A BLONDE GIRL!

Everyone: 0_0

"Well… this person tried to but ended up in the land of tasty food so TokyoTeddyWolf sent someone else to do it instead." Tiger said.

DING DONG

"I'll get it" Tiger got the door. outside the door was a girl scout about 9 years old with brown pigtails.

"Hi I am the replacement for TokyoTeddyWolf. Which one is Jackal?" The girl scout asked cutely.

All the demons pointed toward Jackal.

"Thank you… "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" The girl scout brought out a flamethrower and a chainsaw out of nowhere.

Jackal runs into a room screaming(Little did he know that was the dungeon) being chased by the said Girl scout.

Tiger closes the door after saying "Have fun you two." the agonized screams of Jackal were heard so the door was soundproofed so that the game will continue.

"Next question is for Mard Gear from Violetfairy12. "How do you know the celestial spirit king?"

"We have had numerous battles with no clear winner before but it started when he summoned himself due to the sudden loss of one of the best Celestial mages. we fought ever since." "Mard Gear Answered.

"Ok, Uhh Lamy if you don't like the fact that other girls are prettier than you, why don't you modify yourself to be prettier?"

"I honestly diddn't think about that." Lamy answered.

Ezel, What are your blades made of?

"You know that iron dragon slayer… Gajeel was it? My blades are made of the same material as his scales…Don't ask how I know.

Torofazar, why diddn't you make yourself as hard as a diamond as diamond id the hardest material out there?

"If I did that, I would not be able to move and I can only make myself harder than iron but not steel." Torofazar answered

Keyes, how was Juvia able to destroy you on the inside if A. you are a skeleton and B. you can become a gas at will?

"Even I don't know how that happened. I assume she went into my system through the rope I wrapped around her. if she did, I wouldn't be able to turn into a gas to get her out." Keyes responded.

"Tempester, why do you use words to create disasters and how do you remember them all?"

"They are spells and it is the only other thing I remember besides the pancakes."

"Sailah, do you think that you would like the novel Lucy is writing?"

"The blonde spirit mage is writing a novel… hmm" Sailah Said.

Franmalth, why did you turn into a mushroom on Happy?

"I couldn't think of anything else." Franmalth answered.

And kyókya did you know that Erza really wasn't lying when she said she diddn't know Jellal's whereabouts?

"Wait… WHAT?" Kyókya said.

"Jellal doesn't give his information out to protect both him and Erza." Tiger said.

"So I was just wasting my time… oh well torturing her was nice anyway." Kyókya said.

"That is it people, Let's check on Jackal." Tiger said as everyone went to the dungen door only for the sight and sound to be forever engraved in their minds. Jackal was racked while watching a video of what Natsu saw when he was in the peephole (It was on a special episode.) Earbuds were in Jackal's Ears while he was on fire. Jackal was screaming too.

"Before I forget, does anyone want cookies?" The little girl scout asked.

"I'll have 3 boxes of thin mints please." Tiger said.

"Thank you, does anyone else want cookies?" The girl scout asked.

"Well…" Mard Gear started but was interrupted by the girl scout.

"I SAID DOES ANYONE WANT COOKIES?!" the girl scout screamed while holding a boat over her head.

"We will all get 20 each right everyone." Mard gear said surprisingly panicked.

"Yeah!" the demons said equally panicked.

"Good, well back to torture." The girl scout said.

"That is a wrap people bye" Tiger said.

Later at Lucy's appartment.

Lucy invited Mira, Elfman, and Lisanna to her Apartment. when she opened it Saylah was reading her novel.

"This is really good." Saylah said.

"WHAT THE?!" Elfman, Lisanna, Mira, and Lucy said in unison.

"What is one of the 9 demon gates doing in my apartment?" Lucy asked

"Sorry…" Tiger said as he teleported Saylah away.

"That was weird." Elfman said

done, please send me some more questions. I don't own fairy tail Hiro Mashima does.


	3. Chapter 3

Ask the demons

"We are back and the little girl scout still hasn't finished torturing Jackal." Tiger said. just then the dungeon door opened and Jackal came flying out and landed on top of lamy.

"How bold Jackal." Lamy said with her hands over her mouth.

The girl scout came out holding a frying pan.

"Huh, that is a new record for longest flight due to someone hitting you with a frying pan. I'm impressed." Tiger said.

"And thanks to this experience, I got A lot of new badges. I got the "Torture Badge", The "Dungeon Master Badge", The "Torchered a demon Badge", The "Scared Demons into buying cookies badge" The "Successfully Neutering Badge", The "New World Record Badge", And the "Flamethrower Badge"." The Girl scout said while pointing to her new badges.

"NOOOOOO! JACKAL! Dont worry I will fix it as soon as I get the lab back up." Lamy said

"What kind of Girl Scout camp do you go to?" Jackal asked.

"Shut up! No one wants to listen to you!" The girl Scout said and another badge appeared saying "Badmouthed a Demon".

"So what is your next badge?" Tiger asked.

"Hmmm… I am thinking the "Advanced Motor Mechanics Badge" and the "Monster Truck Voice" Badge." The Girl Scout said.

"SERIOUSLY! WHAT TYPE OF GIRL SCOUT ARE YOU?!" Ezel asked.

"Just your average Girl scout these days. I have to go and thank you for buying 183 boxes of cookies." The girl scout said as she pointed to the cookies.

"Thanks for stopping by." Tiger said.

"Bye" They said while the Girl Scout skipped while singing towards a sunset.

"Ok. Now for questions. to Jackal from Anon Girldone, Ok, SO WHAT THE HECK IS WRONG WITH ME CALLING YOU A CAT? AND IF YOU DO NOT ADMIT THAT YOU ARE A CAT, I WILL TELL LAMY YOU LOVE HER!

The last part was done so that Lamy couldn't hear it.

"Ok, I admit that I look similar to a cat, however my features are more like those of an African wild dog known as a Jackal. Jackals have Ears that are proportioned like a cat and If I was to shrink to the size of a Jackal, my tail would be the same size." Jackal said.

"Wow… you took that very well and you didn't blow up anything. are you feeling ok besides what the girl scout did to you?

"I am fine. I dissipated my anger by making explosions in the sky so small you cant see them. Jackal said.

Next is for Mard Gear from the same person. Do you know that people ship you with Tempesta. And with Seiylah. AND WITH THE SPIRIT KING AKA STASHE FACE!

"Ok… I have to draw the line. With saylah and the spirit king is one thing but Tempesta *Shudders* I don't think I can handle it." Mard geer said.

Everyone O_O

"What? Tempesta already has someone… I think." Mard geer said

"Uhhhh… ok… next question

"Saylah, if you were taken over by Mira how are you here?" Tiger asked

"That is due to Tiger's reality magic and Violet Fairy 12's Life magic and Katarina Midnight's Time magic."Saylah said.

"Oh yeah give it up for VioletFairy12 and Katarina Midnight. Tiger said.

an audience that came out of nowhere applauded for the two ladies as they came onto the stage.

"Sorry we are late. I was in Hawaii for 2 weeks." Violet said.

"And I was busy climbing Mount Everest." Katarina said.

"Alright then Violet, would you like to ask the next question?" Tiger asked.

"Gladly… Silver, WHY THE HECK DID YOU NOT YOU CONTACT YOUR SON? YOU'RE AS BAD AS THE DRAGON PARENTS! At least invite him to Take Your Son To Work Day! Also, talk to him about his stripping habits, the Gray Fanclub can't stop nosebleeding for less than half a minute with how frequently he strips. Might as well play sexy music and throw some glitter and pretty lights everywhere, have a stripper party, have a pole dancing contest. *shrugs* Unless you have a secret stripper life too? Violet asks.

"To answer the first question, I thought he was dead until the Grand Magic Games. the next thing is that it would cause suspicion over my plan to eliminate Tartaros. the third thing is that I wanted Gray to get over his fear of Deliora. the fourth thing is that I can't just bring him into Tartaros and have both him and myself killed. and the sixth thing is that I don't mind the habit as long as he doesn't do it at certain places and times." Silver said.

"Franmalth, is your obsession with money or souls?" Katarina asked.

"Both." Franmalth answered simply.

"Ok. Ezel, do you have a hard time maneuvering your tentacles and arms?" Tiger asked.

"A little, but you get used to it." Ezel said."

"Kyokya, why didn't you use you powers to disable the pain receptors of your allies when you fought Fairytail?" Violet asked.

"That is extremely dangerous, if you don't have pain, you can't tell your limits and you will eventually fall due to injuries you never knew existed." Kyókya answered.

"Tempesta, how many natural disasters can you create? Katarina asked.

"Lets see… I can create Tornados, Lightning, Floods, Fire, Avalanches, Earthquakes, magnetic pulses, Volcanos, gravity changes, Blizzards, Rain, whirlpools, acid rain, and Hail." Tempesta said.

Keyes, why did you do your experiments?" Tiger asked.

"To further in my abilities" Keyes answered.

"Lamy, how do you feel about Jackal blowing you up when he did?" Tiger asked.

"JACKAL I LOVE YOU even though you blew me up. BUT ALL MY CLONES LOVE YOU." Lamy said.

"THERE IS MORE OF YOU! AHHHHHHHHH!" Jackal fainted.

"I guess it is nap time. night night." Lamy said as she fell asleep next to Jackal.

"That is it see you next time" Tiger said.

XXXXXXXXXX

please send me some more questions. I don't own fairy tail Hiro Mashima does.


End file.
